Recently, I've been reading and hearing a lot about how people are having bad days or how life just sucks. Sometimes there's a story behind it, and sometimes there isn't: life just sucks without reason. Perhaps some people don't feel like sharing their problems. They just need a place to vent. Maybe life doesn't suck, and the person complaining is simply over-reacting to a bad incident, or that person is exaggerating something that isn't such a big deal.
Whatever the reason for these bouts of unhappiness, I urge my friends to take a look around you. Look at those less fortunate than you and take a moment to think about those people. Think about what you have that they don't. Think about the life you have lived which they can't even dream of because they don't have the slightest opportunity.
Sure, it can be helpful to feel disappointment at failure. Failure and unhappiness can be a motivator for some people. They thrive on never being satisfied, which in turn fuels their drive towards success. What puzzles and disappoints me is how people often don't realize how fortunate they are.
Let's not even venture into the Third World nations or people who don't have food or shelter. A lot of less fortunate people are closer than you think. I think of the lady who cleans my office. She has never left the country, and likely never will. She will never own a car. She will never own a house. She will never come close to trying half the things I have tried and/or enjoyed in life. I am in absolutely no position to say my life sucks or feel unfortunate while coming in contact with this person day in and day out. To about 90% of my friends: more than half the people that you pass by in the street would trade places with you in an instant. Just think about that sentence for a minute.
So next time you feel you have a bad day, think of these little points:
Bitching about work or something bad that happened is fine. But the next time you feel that your life sucks, stop for a moment and really think hard about what you just felt. Then ask yourself, "is it really that bad?".
Be well.
Whatever the reason for these bouts of unhappiness, I urge my friends to take a look around you. Look at those less fortunate than you and take a moment to think about those people. Think about what you have that they don't. Think about the life you have lived which they can't even dream of because they don't have the slightest opportunity.
Sure, it can be helpful to feel disappointment at failure. Failure and unhappiness can be a motivator for some people. They thrive on never being satisfied, which in turn fuels their drive towards success. What puzzles and disappoints me is how people often don't realize how fortunate they are.
Let's not even venture into the Third World nations or people who don't have food or shelter. A lot of less fortunate people are closer than you think. I think of the lady who cleans my office. She has never left the country, and likely never will. She will never own a car. She will never own a house. She will never come close to trying half the things I have tried and/or enjoyed in life. I am in absolutely no position to say my life sucks or feel unfortunate while coming in contact with this person day in and day out. To about 90% of my friends: more than half the people that you pass by in the street would trade places with you in an instant. Just think about that sentence for a minute.
So next time you feel you have a bad day, think of these little points:
- Don't worry, there are tons of people who still have it worse than you. To prove it:
- If they had there way, there'd be billions of people in this world lining up to trade places with you.
- Look at the guy on your left, is he better off than you? Would you trade places with him? What about the guy on your right? Are you so sure?
- Think of where you stand in the long ladder of society. Take a deep breath. Now slightly tilt your head downwards and ask yourself, "does my life really suck?", "is my day really that bad?", "does it suck as much as that guy down the street?".
Bitching about work or something bad that happened is fine. But the next time you feel that your life sucks, stop for a moment and really think hard about what you just felt. Then ask yourself, "is it really that bad?".
Be well.
8 comments:
thanks to my friends/colleagues who would remind me of what i have when i feel unlucky. they definitely make me happier.
Very well put my friend, you have the potential to become a social worker or some kind a therapist
Ha ha ha, I'm just hoping that people will impose less stress on themselves. Life is tough, but you gotta be positive.
Well said Justin and AhDont. HA HA HA. BUt I still want to be Chinese with I have The Face and Body you mentioned.hum.. it is going to be Hard.
I guess we all know that we are having a life ... hum.. better then a lot of people.
Just need to letting out some BAD mood & stress over in blogs ot to friends are much better to hold it in.
This will be unpopular, but I don't quite agree with your statement. I have been thinking about this topic extensively, forever, non-stop, especially being 1) a pessimist, 2) someone with a good friend who has had a debilitating disease for 6 years, 3) someone who is obsessed with the sorry state of the world.
The conclusion is: we will always think our lives suck even though we know it's really great. It's out of our control to feel adequate, so I might as well stop trying to control it.
There was recently a short news story on Nightline about Forbes's current "richest people in the world" list. Then the question was posed, Are they happy? The answer is no, because people always compare themselves with their "peers," people who are like them. The number 2 richest person on the list will always want to be number 1. This seemed crazy to me then and made me think What's wrong with these ppl, they are like TOP 10 richest in the whole world!
But then I realized when I compare myself with my "peers," I think my life sucks. I am doing the same thing as those billionaires. If I were to ever be more successful than my peers, I will stop comparing myself to them, and start comparing myself to more successful people, who will be my new peers, and the cycle goes on.
Well, it helped me to have this revelation that I'm not a bad person but just trapped in the quagmire of human nature.
kick out girl, I agree
Ahh, the sweet smell of validation.
re: knockoutgirl
You are absolutely right about you comparing yourself with your peers and feeling that your life sucks, but what is stopping you from comparing yourself to people less fortunate than you? There are soooo many of them, that I think you should be able to find a few that you can relate to, and compare yourself to.
The thing is... you have to think of it from a different angle. Don't look at things from the bottom. Instead look at things from the top. Why? Well, cause it is more realistic. What's unrealistic is that Forbes article and those rich dudes. They are the top 1% of the world's population in terms of wealth. I would actually believe it if they all said they can't relate to everyone else. That's just because they are at an ultra extreme end of the scale. They're also way too narrow minded to be able to relate to something trivial (to them) as poverty.
The world is huge and there are so many people that surround us who are less fortunate than us. I am by no means at the top of the food chain, relatively speaking. However, all I have to do is take a peek out of my social circle and I discover that pretty much everyone around me is less fortunate than I am. It is pretty easy for me, since I deal with these people everyday. I've mentioned the cleaning lady, but there's also all my colleagues, the people that sell me breakfast and lunch, those guys who work at McDonald's, the "UPS" dude (its not really UPS), and more...
We have to broaden our views to see reality. I'm surprised that someone so concerned about the world isn't able to see the world as it is. I understand how and why you feel like your life sucks, but I just don't agree.
The "human nature" you describe is a type of "nature" created by people with wealth aka people like us. We think that it is only normal for one to be jealous of thy neighbor and strive for even more success. Yes, this is most prevalent in American culture: the illusive American Dream, the struggle to move up the social ladder, etc. However, I believe that it is NOT human nature to be this way. If you look at other cultures, you'll see that "being content" is a big part of life.
People who can't see out of their own circle of life are either being narrow-minded, or selfish (which isn't necessarily a bad thing). Broaden your horizons, and you might just feel better about yourself in the process.
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